Hoarder of the Check.

In my house hold when it comes to finances Peyton and I are far apart from the spectrum. He’s the spender, wants to buy the biggest tv, a few tacos for dinner 7 days a week. He definitely has no problem with swiping his card left and right. I on the other hand would rather wear the same pair of shoes for 10 years and watch my bank account grow than spend $20 dollars on myself. I feel like it’s an anxiety trigger when I see my bank account hit lower than I would like for it to be. I have this mindset to always be ready for a rainy day.

My husband Peyton has done his best to help me just break out of that habit and “live a little” he calls it. As you may know we have been “youtubers” uploading weekly videos over 6 months now! Which means for the last 6 months I have used Peytons phone to edit every since video we have uploaded. For those who don’t know, editing takes time!! It’s not a cut, pace , upload process. It takes HOURS to produce a 10 minute video! These youtubers who are making big bucks definitely deserve it! To be successful on YouTube it takes creativity and skills. To post a new video everyday and to keep people entertained and coming back for more is harder than you think it would be! Some days I don’t upload because I just physically have no idea what I would record! I blame it on the fact that it mostly because I don’t want to bored people with my same routine at home half the day. Which is probably why most of our “interesting” videos are filmed in the car while we are going somewhere. Anyways back to what I was originally saying, when Peyton would get home I would be away from him for a few hours while I uploaded, edited and downloaded the video to YouTube. For a while now Peyton has been pushing me to get a Apple iPad so that I could edit during the day, and when he comes home I would be able to spend more time with him. At this point Peyton works so much he sees his coworkers more than his family.

Yesterday I made a huge purchase that would change our lives forever! At the beginning of January I had made a tik tok with our vision board! The goals we wanted to accomplish for 2021.

Tik tok Carmelita.middleton

As you can see I had put to purchase a Apple laptop. I realized with two little girls the iPad would be better for me because I needed to be mobile and bring my work anywhere I am. I am so happy to say that I crossed off a goal for my 2021!!! And BOUGHT MYSELF A Apple IPad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My husband had no problem swiping my card when I asked him to buy it. I just couldn’t physically get myself to swipe my card myself. I know it should be a victory moment for myself and my accomplishments but the price tag wasn’t something I wanted to acknowledge to be honest. After a hour on the phone with my dad he explained to me that the iPad was an investment into my work! It’s an investment just like our camera, our ring light, the editing apps I use. Everything we are buying now is to help put our future. This is year three of blogging under mama Carm blogs and to say the least it’s been a journey I’ve worked hard for. I may not post as much as I use to but my ideas are still flowing for my blog! I want to create a safe place for my friends who need advice, want to read stories about my life or who are just simply curious. I know that I have people who have followed along my blog just simply Because they wanted to know. If that’s you right now, thank you! Thank you for just being interested because without you my blog wouldn’t be successful without readers! I made an investment in myself for my future. Now it’s time for you to go out and do the same! Invest in yourself!

I saw this tik tok https://www.instagram.com/reel/CKl_X7UhD1m/?igshid=1ipj59omhx3x2. And it’s just spoke to me! In high school girls were always telling me that my personality was as if I thought I was “better” than them. Which actually was farrrrrrrrr from the truth. I’m just the type of person to not let others see my insecurities. In the video the lady says if I’m not full of myself who else will be? And I felt that because if you aren’t confident in yourself no one else will be! The female species will always find something to “not” like about someone. Which honestly is awful because if you walk into a room like ur worth a million bucks all the females in the room will be intimidated because you aren’t shy and hiding in a corner. This makes no sense to me because why wouldn’t you support someone who thinks of themselves as worthy? The world will never know!

2021 is my year, I’m grasping every opportunity and running with it. This year you can’t catch me because I’m racing towards my finish lines!

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