I found out I was pregnant, second semester of my senior year in highschool. At the time I found out I was pregnant I was 18 and my boyfriend was 17. After i saw the positive pregnancy test i called my boyfriend, crying, telling him I was pregnant and he stayed quiet. We knew we werent ready and even though he didn’t show it, it hit him pretty hard. My boyfriend and I agreed abortion was not an option, for both our families were strictly against it because of religious beliefs. Even though it was my body and my decision, I knew I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I terminated a life. I was judged by family and society, but I regret nothing. I knew with whatever decision I made, it would change my life for the better. 

My parents were disappointed but not angry, they told me they would support me no matter what. Although, some family of mine were judgeful, telling me I should have been more careful and that my life was ruined. As for strangers they just stared or asked how old I was. As for my boyfriends parents they weren’t disappointed just surprised. His family was very supportive, always making sure I was okay. At times I couldn’t believe I was going to be a mother, and for my boyfriend it didn’t hit him until the day our daughter was born. 

This pregnancy was pretty simple, there wasn’t much going on so my boyfriend and I just kept going out and tried doing as much as we could before our daughter got here. I decided to get induced so that we can go to the hospital, relax and just wait for our daughter to come. With the epidural I didn’t feel a thing and birth went by real fast. I was kinda upset that I wouldn’t have my belly anymore, and I kept telling my boyfriend I was going to miss carrying her around everywhere. We named our daughter, Juliette Elizabeth Alvarado, weighing 7 lbs 1oz.

Some couples say having children save a relationship but I dont believe its true. It can turn a relationship for the worst because there is so much work when caring for a newborn, most couples get fed up with each other for not helping the other out. In a family it’s not all about one person it’s about everyone, everyone needs to be working as a team and helping each other out otherwise there may be a lot of stress. In my case, the first few months with Juliette was very hard because I would be the one to stay up at night and then care for my daughter during the day while my boyfriend went to work. I was always in a lot of stress and even broke down to my mom because I was so tired and upset that I wouldn’t get much help from my boyfriend. Eventually I told him how I felt and that we needed to agree on something or I would move back in with my mom. I knew I didn’t want to leave but I was so exhausted I needed the help. After our talk we agreed to work as a team and not argue about our daughter. The months after that was amazing, we got to go out and do things we used to do before Juliette was born. Except the movies! We tried to watch life of pets 2 as a family and she got so loud, I was just happy there were other kids being a little loud but not as loud as her!         

However, back to when Juliette was around 3 months old I started having pregnancy symptoms and decided to take a pregnancy test which came out positive. I was terrified, I wasn’t ready to have a second child, especially since my first won’t even be a year old. I called my boyfriend crying telling him the news, he told me things would be okay and we would figure things out. We went to the doctors to confirm and they told me I was 7 weeks pregnant. I honestly thought abortion was my best option only because I wanted to have time with my daughter and just watch her grow with no distractions for a few years. I told my boyfriend what he thought about abortion and he wanted me to do what i thought was best but that he didnt support the decision. 

However, we decided to keep the baby girl and when we told our parents they took it pretty well, I think since we already had a child they didn’t care as much because we didn’t live with them and we proved to them we didn’t need any help with our daughter physically and financially. So they were just happy to have another grandchild on the way. Some family did tell me that I was making things worse for myself but I just turned them down and told them I still have a whole life a head of me to do what I want.

Juliette didn’t notice my bump until she was about 8 months old and I was about 6 months pregnant. She would always lay her head on my belly or pat it. Being pregnant with an infant was honestly pretty hard, I couldn’t hug her the way I wanted to or cuddle with her at night without her kicking my stomach. I tried to still be active with her as much as possible but most days it consisted with us staying in bed all day. 

My second pregnancy was pretty hard because my back was already in so much pain and Juliette couldn’t walk yet so I was always carrying her. Changing her diaper would be hard too because she liked to kick and move and most times she’d get my stomach. My boyfriend helped me with her as much as he could on his days off which I was extremely grateful. When I turned 36 weeks I was done being pregnant, I was so tired I just wanted it to be over. My doctors office congratulated me for basically being pregnant for almost 2 years and staying sane. 

My water ended up breaking at 39 weeks, I could not keep my excitement I told my boyfriend that we needed to hurry up, drop Juliette off at my moms and get to the hospital because I was done with this pregnancy. After I got the epidural, I still felt my contractions which was strange because with Juliette I didn’t feel a thing. I told the Anesthesiologist that I’m still in a lot of pain and he told me that I needed to feel some of my contractions to be able to push. I thought that was ridiculous but went along with it because the contractions were bearable. After a while we started having complications, my daughters heart rate and oxygen were dropping with each contraction I was having. I was moved in so many positions to keep her rates up and nothing worked. The doctor told the nurses to rush me into emergency c-section and I started crying. I was so scared the nurses tried comforting me but I couldn’t hold back my tears. After the drape went up I started to shake uncontrollably, I squeezed my boyfriends hand when I felt the doctor cut at my skin, and when they started cutting deeper I started to scream because of the pain. The nurses were wondering why I was screaming and were asking me if It was sharp or pressure and I said sharp and just kept screaming, shortly after I blacked out. I don’t think I can fully explain the pain I endured that day. Next thing I know my daughter is in my face, I rush to grab her and hug her. I couldn’t stop crying because of what I just went through, although I was happy it was finally over. We named our second daughter Gabriella Eileen Alvarado weighing 5 lbs 14oz.

When Gabi was born Juliette was only 11 months old. I knew I would be struggling so my boyfriend and I decided to stay at my moms for a few weeks so I can recover. When we went back home I was still in a lot of pain but my kids needed me so I bared with It. I’m still kind of struggling but I’m getting the hang of things now. On my boyfriends days off he helps me with the kids and household chores as much as he can.

Now it is December of 2019, Juliette is 13 months old and finally walking as for gabi, she will be 2 months on the 9th. It’s still pretty hard to care for these girls at the same time but not impossible! I got the hang of going out with them by myself now. I cannot wait to watch these two grow!

For those young moms out there, don’t let anyone tell you that you runied your life becasue I promise, you have a long way to go, to still go to school or achieve any goal you had for yourslef. For those getting c-sections don’t think it’ll be like mine everyone is different, I’ve heard people say they dont feel anything at all. You’ll have obsticles but I know you can overcome those obsticles becasue there are people who care about you and will help you.  

Now it is December of 2019, Juliette is 13 months old and finally walking as for gabi, she will be 2 months on the 9th. It’s still pretty hard to care for these girls at the same time but not impossible! I know with babies it’s hard to make a routine because they’re so unpredictable but honestly making one and just having that schedule in your mind really helps. For my girls they’ll wake up in the morning Ill give them both there bottles, sometimes Juliette will get cereal or a snack depending what time she wakes up then she’ll play for a little and shortly after Gabi will fall asleep. Then it’s time for Juliette and I to eat, and after she’s done it’ll be noon which means nap time. After she falls asleep gabi wakes up gets a bottle and stays up for a little then falls asleep which means I got an hour or two of free time to wash clothes, wash bottles, take the dog out, and clean the room. The girls then wake up both get bottles again, Juliette doesn’t really need a bottle but I give it to her just in case I take a little while to feed her if Gabi is fussy or crying and wants to be held. After Juliette gets her snack she’ll play and wait for her dad to come home so we can all eat dinner together. Around the evening Gabi sleeps the most so I’ll have a little more free time to just be with Juliette and take small breaks. Most times my routine doesn’t work out and I got both babies crying because they’re hungry or just want to be held. It can be very frustrating but the key is to not lose your patients and I use pacifiers which are life savers because it helps with the crying. I have also successfully gone out with the girls on my own so that we all aren’t trapped at our house 24/7. I Try going out 2 to 3 times a week so that these girls can get some fresh air, Gabi may not know but Juliette goes crazy. Honestly, I can’t wait for my girls to grow together and just play outside or wherever on there own like my twin and I.