Most people my age don’t have to worry about this situation. After all, it’s about a handful of teenagers who actually become parents before they leave high school.
When I first found out I was expecting my world went into a spiral. I could just hear my parents yelling and saying what every other parent would say.
“You ruined your life!”
“Do you not know how to use protection?”
“I’m very disappointed!”
All of these were what I was being prepared for. I was telling myself that no matter what everyone in my family would look at me differently. I was gonna be the outcast of the family. No one would talk to me because I got pregnant at 17.
The thoughts going through my head were just bazaar and unreasonable. Peyton and I waited two whole days before we even said anything to anyone. But I can say the first people we told were our parents. My advice, since your here reading I guess I can offer you some from experience. You look on social media and on youtube and there’s always a cute surprise of people telling their parents they will be grandparents. However, as a teen parent, it’s not always that exciting.
I remember the night we told our parents. Man if I would of know what I do now I think we would have told them a lot sooner. Like I said since your here I guess I’ll give you some advice.
1. Tell your parents as soon as you know!
* I can’t stress this enough as to why it’s so extremely important to tell your parents as soon as possible. If your the girl in the situation letting your parents know ASAP will help you get the right medical attention you need for you and your unborn child.
*However if you still feel as if your parents won’t understand or won’t accept you keeping your child, please go out and buy prenatal pills. Prenatal pills are a dietary supplement providing vitamins to help your baby grow exceptionally well!
In this step, it’s extremely important to understand that your parents won’t stay mad at you for forever. Once your child is born everything your family held over your head, stayed up at night thinking about how they went wrong as a parent will all disappear once your baby is born.
I believe that letting your parents know as soon as possible (ASAP) rather than later will help settle the news before your baby gets here. Surprise you have nine months to prepare to become grandparents. It’s a tough pill to swollen when your baby comes home telling you they will be having a baby. Trust me as a mom of a now 7-month old I can’t imagine her coming home at 17 telling me she’s gonna have a baby.
One thing is for sure I won’t be upset because I can’t be. I had a baby at 18, I basically birthed her into this whole teen mom situation. Statistics say,
“Girls born to teenage mothers are 22 percent more likely to become teenage mothers themselves.”
To me, That’s kinda outrageous. My daughter will grow up and become her own person.
2. Be confident in your decision whether it be keeping or adoption.
* Our parents will always look at us like we’re a newborn straight out the womb even when we’re 50 years old. So if you made a decision based on what you wanted don’t let them change your mind because it’s your body, your baby and at the end of the day your life.
Whatever situation you maybe in, whether the father is in the picture or not. Make your decision based on what you think is best for you. I know so many amazing mothers who do it all by their selves and do it well.
For the guys, every child deserves a father but that doesn’t necessarily mean they need one. That also goes for the ladies as wells. Parenting is a choice, not a job. The decisions you make now will and can affect your child in the future.
3. Tell your parents together.
My dearest friend always says,
“It takes two to tango.” -Holly Jordon
(Go check out her blog at http://www.Theidealisticmom.wordpress.com)
She’s right, no matter how scared you are or whatever the case maybe it’s easiest when you have each other to support in this terrifying experience. When Peyton and I first found out we were expecting we made a promise to tell our parents together. We saw it as, as long as we had each other to lean on this situation was one we could pass through hand in hand. It was so much easier to tell them because we were able to answer all the questions and sit through all the lectures together. Based on statistics most teenage relationships don’t last and when you put a baby in the mix the survival rate drops faster than a hot potato.
4. Tell your parents in person!
I know shooting a text or simply calling them over the phone may seem mostly ideal but it’s not. I would only recommend telling your parents over the phone if it’s ONLY NECESSARY! When you own up and tell your parents in person it gives them a sign that you are able to own up to the situation and take control.
I remember being terrified standing behind Peyton’s front door as he held my positive pregnancy test in a ziplock bag contained in his pocket. At this point, we have dated a year and I was very comfortable around his family. My biggest fear was that they wouldn’t allow me to date their son anymore or even worst hate me. My fear is what made me scared and overwhelmed.
The scenario I had built up inside my head was by far what had actually happened. Peyton’s whole family was nothing but supportive. No one treated me different. However, It was a little different for Peyton when we told my mom. She was upset and disappointed but after a while realized that Peyton was stepping up to the plate and wasn’t going anywhere.
Since my dad lives kinda far and doesn’t come into Katy because he’s working mostly. I did have to send him a text message explaining my situation and how I took and test and it came out positive. Not gonna lie I was scared my father would be upset with Peyton, however, that again was far from what happened. From day one he was supportive and extremely positive throughout the whole process!
5. Involve your parents in your pregnancy.
This one may not be all about telling them that you’re expecting. But having your parents come to the ultrasounds and doctor appointments will make them feel good. After all there baby is having a baby. I know when I encouraged My parents to come they were so excited and overwhelmed with excitement. Not only should you involve your parents but your partner’s parents are now your family as well whether you like it or not. You’re Apart of there family tree for good.
One way that I found the most exciting was having a gender reveal. At this point, our entire family knew we were expecting and we invited them to join us for a party on finding out our the gender. I believe this pulled both our families together. The little things are what matters. I never really cared about my family members touching my belly. In fact, it was gravitating to be able to let my family members create an experience with our unborn child.
Teen pregnancy isn’t the end of the world. Multiple people have babies young, I’m one of them and I’m doing better than most people expected me to do. It’s not the end of your life, in fact, its just the beginning.